Courting: Does One Size Fit All???
Thanks to Tonya for stepping on to The ManChild Swagga to post some real talk about relationships… from a females perspective. Tonya’s message was filled with real questions, and real questions need real answers. While I understand the overall intent of the post, I also recognize a need to “man up” and take some accountability by peeling this onion a little more to shed my thoughts. So here we go (in response to Tonya’s post):
Tanya: Do they (men) really want to get to know me or are they just trying to get me?
TMS: Well, Tanya… 5 of 6 men surveyed would say that these men are trying to get you, translation: they are trying to get the cake and the coochie.
Tanya: What happened to the days of courting?
TMS: Courting is a beautiful thing when you are thinking of the long range potential. Typically, men are anxious to court when they feel the following:
- She possesses qualities that I REALLY like, yes, she can be my wifey.
- I don’t want to be a player any more
Tanya: Am I living in a fairytale world to believe that true courtship still exists? Am I just a hopeless romantic?
TMS: This questions sounds somewhat rhetorical, but it deserves an answer. True courtship does exist, and as we do live in a world that seems to recalibrate our standards in warp speed, the beauty of true bliss will never be lost. Self admittedly, men are work… and I am certainly guilty.
I respect relationships. I also love to be in a relationship, no matter how blissful or volatile. I tend to look at relationships as a work in progress, and before I strap up to ready myself for the journey, I have to look at myself as:
- Ready to settle down, or,
- Not ready to settle down
I am absolutely positive that the amount of effort that I put into a relationship usually coincides with the feelings that I have before I even meet her. In other words, am I ready to settle down? As is such, I meet her… I like her… but more importantly, I learn to accept her standards.
I can’t speak for all men when it comes to this rationale, but if most men do agree with me on this, this really puts love into a “one size fits all” dynamic. But as I scratch my head (thinking about this), it seems too easy. Or is it?
Filed under: courting, love, relationships | 1 Comment
“Courting: Does One Size Fit All???” I say no, but “aaarrgghhh” to the rest of the post. I know that there is no blueprint for dating, relationships, etc. Frankly, I think I’m quite lost on the concept, by today’s standards that is. I just want to be midway between kicking it and serious relationship. What is that called? :p